Driving home stuffing my face with kitkat and high on drugs. The reality of the situation had not really sunk in 100%. I was with the fairies, having a jolly time, excited for Christmas and to see the puppies when I got home.
Fast forward to around 10pm, I was aching, couldn’t get comfortable, therefore couldn’t sleep and my pjs wouldn’t fit over the enormous tummy I was sporting. I found myself thinking about how this would change my life….. would I be able to have my own children, experience the pregnancy glow and the morning sickness, experience making, growing and birthing a baby? I was absolutely shattered!
The next few days I was experiencing dizziness from the altered blood pressure, pain of the physical and mental kind and also frustration at my two beautiful Grandmothers, who bless their hearts, were around at my house cleaning. But really I wanted to be alone, I was sick of explaining what was going on and recruited Mum as the family advisor (another thank god for Mum moment).
Life started to get easier, mentally and physically! I was healing well and in a few days it was Christmas, just in time to take my mind off things. In no time at all it was my six week check up and I finally got to ask some questions about my abnormality…… instead of asking Doctor Google (I Know, mistake!). I was still experiencing pain and we began to realise that the abnormality may be the cause of the pain.
Bit of an anatomy lesson here guys….. but I have a unicornuate uterus, half of my uterus is detached from the other half, causing only one ovary and Fallopian tube to assist me in conceiving….. but there is a very small space for carrying a little person. (refer to my fave pic for explaining it to peeps). So, as you can see, I had so many questions! Like, would I ever be able to have children? If so, naturally or not? Would I need to freeze some eggs? Could I have a natural birth due to my small cervix? The list goes on and on! My questions were finally answered….. I have a chance of having children, although I may need the assistance of IVF. I also cannot have a natural birth due to the size of my uterus and my cervix and I probably need to start thinking about freezing my eggs. My head was spinning…. this time not because of the drugs, but because of the information.
Fast forward a month, sitting in the doctors waiting room, in persistent pain…… here we go again.